Ramblings

I'm a stay at home mom. Which means I don't have many adult conversations during my day. I noticed that when I do talk to adults I have a hard time formulating sophisticated sentences. So I decided that whenever I get a chance and I have something I want to talk about, other than dirty diapers and what sound a dog makes, I'll type it out on here. Maybe I can get better at turning my thoughts into sentences...eventually.

So here it goes.....

Middle school and high school I counted down the days till Christmas break or till the end of the year. I counted down the days till my next birthday. Turning 12 meant going in to Young Womens. 13 meant I would finally be a teenager. 14 meant I could go to all the Stake and Regional dances. Then I counted down the days till I could get my driver's permit. Then finally I was 16 and I could start dating and get my licence. Then I was a junior in high school and I couldn't wait to be a senior. Then I was a senior and I was counting down the days till graduation.

I felt like during that time I never really lived in the moment...I was always counting down the days to the next big thing. I always told myself, "Things are going to be so much better when ....". But did my life magically become more awesome when I was finally able to go to Regional dances? No. Was I suddenly 65% more cool just because I had my license? Nope.

I wish that I would have been "in the moment" more, not just constantly, impatiently waiting for something.

Even when I was in college, the main thing I was waiting for, I counted down the days. I was a little better by then though. I tried to enjoy it as much as I could. I didn't have so much of that "I can't wait till this is over" attitude.

There were some cases when I did very much enjoy the counting though. I counted down the days till Tome came home. I counted down the days till our wedding day. I counted down the days till Owen was born. I counted down the days till Conner was born. But I feel like I have definitely, finally learned to be in the moment. To be happy now. To not just sit and wait for things to get better.